on a more personal note

i am feeling grumpy and beligerantly american this morning.

• i know, i know, i chose to move to london and it was a big dream of mine for a long time, but i want american things today.
• i want cheap restaurants with huge portions and doggy bags.
• i want people to complain to the right people (meaning: not me! i can't make the bus driver go faster, i also can't help you get better service at the bank, i can only help you with your filing needs and maybe if i think you are neat i will write you a poem. maybe).
• i want a bigger apartment. not a flat, an apartment.
• i don't want to say zed, i want to say zee.
• i want you to say merry christmas not happy christmas.
• i want a chicago style hot dog.
• i want a decent cup of coffee.
• i want to buy shoes without being stressed out about the size conversion.
• i want to be a size 12 again instead of a 14 or 16, i know the clothes are the same size but it makes me feel better about myself!
• i want more shared cultural references, i don't know who half the people you talk about are!
• i want everyone to quit asking me where michigan is. it's at the top, it looks like a hand, it's easy to remember.
• i want you all to pronounce my lousy name correctly.
• i want to be able to meet my 6 month old niece in person.
• i want to stop feeling like a hick when i pronounce certain words (eg: wolf, museum, barry, carribean, even iraq i keep saying it with a long I which is not as bad as my mom always saying eye-talian, but still).
• i want everyone to swear more.
• i want a taco that doesn't cost £5.
• i want a bottle of bell's oberon beer.

i just want more comfortable things. even though i am mostly looking forward to christmas i am not entirely (not that i've ever been particularly well known for my christmas spirit) because it's going to be sort of lonely without either of our families around (even if his family doesn't celebrate christmas, obviously. i still get to be a spy in the house of david at the chinese restaurants on christmas eve) and i know, i know i always bitch about them when they are around. i'm a bad person, okay?

i'm just feeling grumpy and selfish and out of sorts today. not exactly homesick more annoyed at the distance and the lack of affordable mexican food. that is probably the same as being homesick, but i don't like to admit to being homesick since i never used to feel that way, not at band camp or confirmation camp, or college or after. well maybe a lottle in vegas and the first year in chicago, but across the ocean is different, and there were burritos and tacos a plenty in vegas and chicago.