Issues, I got subscriptions!

Issue the first, the sort of grody one:

Something is seriously wrong with my stomach. for the last 2.5 weeks or so I've been experience really bad sharp pains and sporadic bouts of diarrhea. Good times. So I went to the GP last Thursday and saw a very nice medical student who was super excited about my past issues with Salmonella and arthritis. I always mention it when i have anything wrong with my stomach because I've been told it can trigger other shit. It was cute how his eyes lit up when I told him how much fluid they drained from my knee, usually that makes people wince. Anyhow the verdict last week was that it was probably bad acid reflux triggered by a virus i had in March. They gave me a prescription for Zantac (further proof that I am actually an old man rather than a youthful 30 year old). Everything was going okay after that although I was still feeling sluggish but I've blamed that on all the cocktails on Saturday. But then I woke up at 4am yesterday with bad bad pains in my stomach. they passed and it was just mild pain for the rest of the day, no big.
This morning I woke up and had my Emergen-C with Glucosamine (OLD MAN = me!) and immediately went for my morning poo, in which I found mucousy blood. Not too dark but also not bright. And i was having some pretty bad stomach pain. It mostly passed but on the bus ride to work my stomach started to feel really tight in a weird way. So I set up someone else to take my conference call this afternoon and begged my way into an emergency appointment with my GP at 11 (I am still amazed that my GPs accept same day appointments, most places it is nearly impossible to do this, yet another testament to the fact that they are 100% better than my assy old doctors.) Anyhow, today's GP had me do a poo sample and had the nurse take some blood. She wants to be sure that the Salmonella isn't resurfacing even though she thinks that's unlikely and seems to be leaning more towards some type of Inflammatory Bowel Disease
I'm holding out hope for an ulcer.


Issue the second:

I called up the Jungian to cancel my appointment tonight and he couldn't remember who I was. I get that he's probably a very busy man with a lot going on, and if I had called on say Monday or Friday, or really, any day when I didn't have a scheduled appointment, I wouldn't have minded that he couldn't remember who the hell I was after hearing a good sized portion of my life story. But shit dude, keep your planner to hand and try to remember your new clinets' names.

I'm probably not going back. i was on the fence about him anyhow, but if he can't remember my name I have a hard time having much faith in his ability to help me sort my shit out. Does that make me too demanding?

Issue the third:

I'm just not fond of myself right now. I feel like I'm being too grumpy and negative and like I need to just suck it up. I need to get over my job dissatisfaction and get more motivated with my writing and not be such a cow to my family. My brother was here on Monday night. We went out to dinner and I totally made all these jokes that I knew were making him uncomfortable, I was doing exactly what he and my parents do to me and it was so childish and lame. I do not want to be such a passive aggressive beast.

But maybe he wasn't uncomfortable at all, maybe he just thought my jokes were lame. Maybe I'm over analyzing. That is probably the most likely answer.

Issue the fourth:

I just used the term cow like an English person. I hate referring to women as cows, the only other time I've ever done that was in reference to my niece's mother and maternal grandmother when they were shitty to my niece and even though they bug the hell out of me I was still disappointed in myself for calling them cows.

Dr Mary, my Chicago Psychotherapist, always told me I was too hard on myself and that I needed to treat myself more gently. Right now, if I told her that I was an idiot for calling anybody a cow she would probably focus on the fact that I was calling myself a cow. we would probably both think the other was missing the point.